1.  Candle Flame

It was dark at night, I was sitting at a sidewalk, my legs crossed with a canndle in my hand waiting.  Didn't know what I was waiting, but I knew I was waiting.  Actually the only thing I knew was that I was waiting.  But suddenly a car just passed by with a wind chasing after it and as passing by trying to blow out the candle in my hand.  Closed my eyes so that I wouldnt have to see the flame go out.  Waited for the wind to pass and as everything calmed down again, I felt the warmth of the flame on my face as I opened my eyes to see it still burning just as before. 

I continued waiting.  Don't know how long I was there and don't know for how long I will be there.  Time was passing but I dont know how fast it was passing.  If only I could see a star or the moon but there was nothing I could see except the small area that the candle had lit.  Then it started to rain.  It wasn't raining hard but I could feel it.  Feel it hitting my bare arm, my ears.  Feal it on my T-shirt and short.  It felt like the summer rains but that it wasn't as fast as a summer rain.  Yet I couldn't care about getting wet that the fear of a rain drop hitting the flame was scarring me.  I could see the rain drops as it pass next to the flame of the candle missing it too close.  For some time it continued to rain till it faded and stoped. 

Again I continued on waiting.  Without sense of time or place.  Sitting with my legs croosed looking forward for maybe to see a sign or something...

And then I saw something.  A spot of light far away.  I couldn't figure out if it was moving or not but I knew it was coming for me.  As my heart started to beat faster the light I see turned out to be a flame of a candle just as the one I was holding, getting closser at me.  I wanted to get up but I couldnt. And even if I did I woudnt know what to do.  Run away or run to it.  But I couldn't move.  I just sat at the sidewalk waited for it.

As it came closer I saw the face of the one helding the candle as it lit her face.  Then I realized that there were no reason to be afraid.  At that moment I found the power to stand up.  As I stood up she was infront of me with her candle with this most beautiful smile looking at me.  I didn't know who she was but I felt this peace like on a rainy day sitting on a chair, with a cup of coffee reading a book as a soft music playin at the background hearing the rain hitting the window as the woods chatter in the fireplace.  With her smile came a smile to my face and saw her holding her candle forward.  I holded out my candle so that our flames would meet to become more brighter flame.  As the flames of the two candle met became a light so bright that it forced me to shut my eyes.

After few seconds I found myself lying in my bed trying to open my eyes.  As I slowly opened my eyes, I saw her opeing the shades of the windows for the morning light to rush in the room.  Saw her face with that same beautiful smile.  Same smile that the candle flame lit that made me feel peace...

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2.  The Mirror

"Good morning honey.  I guess you had a good sleep.  I love you when I see you smile"

"I saw you in my dream again"

"It's the third time this week darling.  Was it like the others?"

            Yes the others.  As mysterious as the others.  It's always you coming out of the dark and taking me to the light.  I wish I could understand what my dreams are trying to tell me. 

"Yes it was similar to the others."

"You'll tell it at the breakfast.  Now get your lazy butt up and take a shower and come down.  Leave the bed I'll straighten it up"

            My attempt to make the bed is stopped by a gentle slap at my hand.  I smile at her to see her smile once more.  And yes there it is again.  Does she know what her smile means to me.  I've told her that I loved her smile but did she ever really understand what it meant to me.  Now as I look at myself at the mirror in the bathroom I remember the day I fell in love with her smile.  It was June, and I was at the pier at Santa Barbara.  If I had time, even if it was like 2 hours drive away from where I lived at then I would go there to rent a bike and ride up the coast and in to the ranch, go down through the State Street and then go to the pier and watch the ocean.  I was sitting at a log at the end of the pier when she came next to me to take a photo of the coast where you could see a guy flying one of those huge kites which it probably would drag me with it if I tried to fly it.  After she lowered the camera I saw her face.  Then she turned at me and smiled.

"Beautiful, isn't it"  pointing the ocean with her gaze.

"Most beautiful" without turning my look at the ocean still looking at her.  "Yes, you are most beautiful"

"Thank you"

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to..."

"You didn't mean to what?  Say that?  I would be disappointed if you didn't."

"I'm sorry, I had never said that out loud to someone I don’t know, and I was expecting something different"

"You were expecting me to get annoyed?  Give you a disgusting look and walk away?  That would be rude when you receive a compliment, don't you think."

"That would be true, maybe two generations ago, but at our days people react as if it was an insult."

"Well would you like to buy this beautiful lady a drink?"

"Only in one condition.  You are to smile during the whole time"

"Agreed.  Lead the way Sir...?"

"Timothy LANDSON.  But call me Tim"

"OK Tim, I am going to assume you asked my name too.  I am Ashley WILLIAMS"

"I'm sorry, I am really bad at this, but I'll forget your name in a hour but I wont forget your smile.  That is why I stopped asking names."

"Interesting.  Tell me more."

As the vision of her face faded in the mirror I saw myself again but this time I was drying my hair with the towel.  I hate when I do things automated.  I feel like I miss that part of my life.  You are doing something but you aren't actually living it.  In another way you aren't really living.  When you are in a hurry you eat something but you don't notice that you are eating.  And after a hour you asked yourself if you had lunch or not cause you don't really remember cause actually you didn't live that moment.

I should get dressed up and go down to eat.  It's going to be a long day today.

I ran into this felow when I was visitin BabyKarma1 ((http://spaces.msn.com/members/bradbyiv)

So cute is he not  :)

It was an ordinary day sitting at a chair at the store watching people pass by.  Then I see two ladies holding the hands of a year old baby helping him/her walk.  With nothing to do this idea slips into my mind about a grown up's mind and soul getting to live in a year old baby's body.  I find myself imagining two giants holding my hands above my head helping me stand up and walk as I try to step forward but they move so fast that I end up getting draged till the clumbsiness of one, having my hand slip out of hers and find myself draged down by the gravity untill the other lady pulls me from my other hand as if she wants to rip it off my body so that I wouldn't smash my face to the pavment!  And I helplessly just watch the world moving up and down as I being draged by forces that are so big and out of my control...  God help the babies  :)

Once upon a time was this girl who was to grow up to be beautifull and to a time where beauty would be a curse.  That time is now where she is forced to be someone she isn't.  The beauty where used to be respected is now is a place where it is insulted and looked upon with disgusting lust. 

To the ladies out there that has the courage to stand out against these times;  for what it worths,  RESPECT.  I bow to you.